Many books and courses on memoir writing encourage you to dig deep into your psyche. They talk about memoir writing as a kind of healing therapy where authors come to terms with their pasts. Some bestselling books in the genre, like Mary Karr’s The Liars Club and the more recent Wild by Cheryl Strayed, are veritable rollercoasters of emotional revelation. 

Do you need to divulge your innermost secrets and lay bare your traumas in order to write a great book? In short, no. That’s one way to go, but it’s certainly not the only prescription for a wonderful memoir. 

I am a firm believer that everyone has stories worth telling. They don’t need to be traumatic or earth-shattering to qualify for a book. I have worked with many authors who feel they had full and rewarding lives—of course with bumps along the way—and would be hard pressed to come up with anything truly traumatic to include in their books. 

Not everyone lives a life of great adversity. Perhaps you weren’t raised by a bipolar survivalist in rural Idaho (see Educated), and you don’t feel the need to heal. Maybe you’re not someone who dwells on life’s deeper meaning, or you don’t want to share those thoughts with an audience. 

Your book will not be “less than” because you don’t spill your guts. Some of my favorite memoirs are simply a collection of stories that paint a portrait of the author—the highs, lows, funny parts, coincidences, and lessons learned that give that person a unique perspective on life.   

Actress and director Penny Marshall wrote a memoir called My Mother Was Nuts. Reading the book felt like sitting down for coffee with Penny. She does not explore her motivations or reveal any startling truths. She was a brash, funny, caring, and talented woman who did not like to analyze her emotions. Her book conveyed exactly who she was, and it made for a great read.  

Maude, a biography of a woman living in the early 1900s, follows a simple, diary-style structure, reporting her daily activities and the events that shaped her life. She speaks to readers simply and honestly, and you can’t help but be engrossed in the twists and turns of her story. Maude, one of my favorite memoirs, shows that you don’t need to be a celebrity to get away with just telling stories. Anyone can create an interesting book this way.  

If the thought of plunging into the depths of your soul or telling all your secrets is stopping you from starting your memoir, let go of that worry. Wonderful memoirs are made from good stories and an authentic voice. If readers can relate to your experiences because you’ve written about them honestly, that’s a success. Be honest, be yourself, and write what you want to share.